Rejection at work can feel like a personal attack. And even if you believe it is, there are intelligent ways to navigate that “NO” like a pro.
Surprisingly, one of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in my career is to be grateful for the “NO’s.”
Sounds strange, right?
But those moments of rejection have often led to my most significant breakthroughs and collaborations.
Instead of seeing a “NO” as a dead-end, I’ve learned to view it as an opportunity to engage, understand, and ultimately create better solutions.
Here’s how to turn those “NO’s” into something positive and why you might find yourself grateful for them too.
Do NOT Take it Personally
That “NO” is rarely about you as a human. More often, it’s about differing perspectives, priorities, values, or constraints. Understanding the why behind the “NO” allows you to shift from feeling attacked to seeking solutions.
When faced with a “NO” consider this:
- Be honest! Disclose your dilemma by explaining how this “NO” jeopardizes your project.
- Then, pose a question that invites collaboration. “If we don’t follow this path, we’ll run out of time and resources. However, I’m curious: how would you approach this?”
This method accomplishes two things:
- Encourages Empathy: You’re opening a dialogue that allows others to see the issue from your perspective.
- Invites Collaboration: Encourages others to contribute their ideas, potentially leading to a more effective solution.
A Real-World Example
My client Jane leads a global project management team at a tech company. She developed a new workflow to streamline her team’s processes. Confident in her solution, she presented it to her manager, only to receive a firm “NO.”
She immediately felt defeated… for 60 seconds.
She quickly recovered and disclosed her dilemma: “I see you have concerns. My fear is that without this workflow, our current process will lead to additional delays.” “How would you rather tackle this?”
By involving her boss, Jane gained his empathy and insights. They co-created a hybrid solution that addressed Jane’s concerns and her manager’s reservations.
Why This Approach Works
- Promotes Mutual Understanding: Sharing your dilemma shows your honesty and transparency.
- Builds Stronger Relationships: Collaborative problem-solving fosters trust and respect.
- Leads to Better Solutions: Combining perspectives often results in more innovative and effective solutions.
What If You Can’t Find Common Ground?
Sometimes, you might not find common ground. This might signal a deeper misalignment between your values and those of your organization. If this happens frequently, it might be time to reassess your fit within the team or organization.
Learning to handle rejection intelligently can transform your work life, making you more resilient and collaborative.
Next time you hear a “NO,” remember: it’s not a roadblock but a detour to a potentially better path. You’ve got this!
With love, Mari Carmen
