I ask my clients the same first question at the beginning of every relationship.
Why do you want to be a leader?
And the most common response I receive is the desire to inspire.
You want to inspire.
But most leaders aren’t inspiring their people in the way they want to.
In many cases, they’re actually contributing to low grade anxiety, busyness and perfectionism.
Believe it or not, what is required for them to have the impact they want, will, for most women, also be quite unwelcome.
Most leaders think they are being inspirational when they are actually being aspirational.
And there is a crucial difference between the two.
Aspirational is defined as “desiring to achieve social prestige and material success.” It comes from the Latin word, aspirare, which means “to strive for” or “seek to reach.” It is more literally translated as ‘rough breathing.’
Inspirational is defined as: “providing or showing creative or spiritual inspiration.” The word inspire comes from the Latin word that means “breathe” or “blow into.” Literally translated as “to breathe life into.”
Aspirational leaders are impressive, successful, and seemingly perfect – they make mistakes and tell people about them after the fact.
At the deepest level, many female leaders are aspirational.
When you lead from a place of aspiration, you unknowingly contribute to the addiction of perfectionism. You communicate to other ladies, “When you can be impressive and perfect like me, you will also be fit to lead and worthy to receive acknowledgement and recognition.”
Even if you don’t mean to, this is what happens in every organization I’ve ever counseled (including families.)
To inspire your people beyond busy perfectionism and into unprecedented growth will require you to be vulnerable, transparent, and to fail more often and more openly than you ever have before.
In other words, what truly inspires is imperfection.
Ask yourself, when economies are down, pressure is on, people are scared, and your team is being pushed to innovate and grow even more, who is the leader that inspires you?
…The leader with narcissistic characteristics who shouts, “Follow me! I am your boss. Do as I say and you will thank me later.”
…Or the one who whispers, “Hey listen. I’m not perfect, this is new terrain and I don’t exactly know how we’re going to come through this yet. We’re going to make mistakes and get it wrong. And when we get to the other side, we’re going to be proud as hell and stronger for it.”…?
At The Academy this year, we’re going to teach you how to shift from aspiration to inspiration.
We’re going to show you how to own your flaws so that you can claim your leadership potential.
Come to The Academy. Our world needs a new kind of leader. And you need a break from trying to lead from busyness and perfectionism.
Your freedom from these ailments is also the key to being the leader your team is dying for, and you’re dying to be.
Come to The Academy.
It won’t just change the way you lead.
It will change the way you live.
With love,
Mari Carmen
