What I’m about to tell you, may be shocking and even somewhat controversial: women are holding themselves back because they are blaming men. There. I said it. In this article, I will share lies that you may have believed about women in the workplace and the glass ceiling.
I spent 18 months working with 18 high ranking female leaders that were highly educated, confident and well respected in their organizations. And at the same time these women were struggling because, throughout their careers, they were told they needed to be:
They were told they needed to work harder than men to be noticed.
And you know what? They wholeheartedly believed these things. It’s no surprise these mighty ladies were feeling bitter, frustrated and exhausted. Also, they all reported directly to male managers, or to a 100% male board of directors.
This dynamic is not uncommon; however, before you rush to the idea that it was the men who were holding them back. It wasn’t.
THE TRUTH: It was their male managers who hired me. Men that care deeply about the development and advancement of women.
One of the men, who was the president of a top fifty global organization indicated that he wanted his female direct report to replace him. His goal was to groom her to move into his role! Another wanted his report to lead a coveted international assignment.
But something was off, it wasn’t performance, but something deeper that they couldn’t pinpoint.
Once we began going deep into the coaching sessions and, when I listened to the various rationales, theories and responses, every single one of the women said:
Maybe it’s because I am a woman.
They believed they had not attained more success because they were female. They had been sucked into the lie that many women have believed for far too long, and it’s time to bring out the truth.
The McKinsey Global Institute conducted a study that proves that there are 9 leadership behaviors critical for the success of any organization.
- People development
- Creating expectations and reward systems
- Role modeling
- Inspiration
- Participative decision making
- Effective communication
- Intellectual stimulation
- Control and corrective action
- Individualistic decision making
The study points out that out of the 9 critical behaviors of leadership, women apply 5 of them more often than men, naturally, just by being female and those are:
The lesson here is huge, because I used to believe that too. It’s not about being stronger, or louder or pushing and bulldozing our way to the top.
It is instead about creating an environment of personal and professional growth geared to heighten the 5 behaviors that come naturally to women instead of hiding them. Then it’s a matter of learning how to develop and leverage the rest.
The truth is that It’s not about a 50/50 approach for men and women. We don’t need to become like the men because we are not the same.
When we start stepping up and recognizing that men are not our enemies, but our counterparts, we may just finally be able to close the DAMN gender gap ONCE AND FOR ALL.
Are you ready to change the corporate conversation? Discover if coaching is the next step for you–let me know. I’m happy to help. http://maricarmenpizarro.com/contact-mari-carmen/
